Write About Now

Today I received this email:

Jennifer,

I was brokenhearted last night at our small group Bible study when my friend poured out her heart and tears concerning the drain she feels because she has trouble drawing lines between her job as the church secretary, her personal (“off the clock”) ministry to the church, and her responsibilities of home and husband. Her struggle is amplified because, even as a relatively new Christian, she can identify the gap between the Biblical counsel of the church leaders and the reality of their own lives. I feel my advice to her was helpful but painfully inadequate. I am having a terrible time finding any articles about the ministry to the ministers, or helping the helpers. With all you do, you must have personally come to some conclusion on this matter, and I respect your opinion and advice. Have you written any articles or are you aware of any resources that may help my friend and her husband separate employment from ministry from family, but yet stay connected to them all?  How do you define the line between devotion to a ministry and workaholism (by your choice) or abuse (by the choice of others)? I would appreciate any references to which you can direct me.

Your brother in Christ,
—–
There are very few people or organizations I recommend without qualification, but Cloud Townsend Resources is one. Cloud and Townsend wrote the masterpiece Boundaries and have separately authored other great books including Changes that Heal, Handling Difficult People, and 9 Things You Simply Must Do.

Henry Cloud, whose dry sense of humor in live presentations makes him my favorite half of the duo, just released his new book, The One-Life Solution: Reclaim your personal life while achieving greater professional success. I haven’t read it yet, but I trust Cloud so much I recommended it to my friend immediately.

“The author hones in on common weaknesses—overdeveloped needs for security, approval and perfectionism—and leads readers through a plan for regaining control of themselves, their work and their lives with easy-to-follow activities to implement changes as personal policies,” writes Publishers Weekly. “Unfailingly encouraging, Cloud is a fine advocate for the benefit of gaining control and protecting boundaries and his book is a must-have life management bible.” A PW review is one of the reviews that matters, especially in “secular” publishing, so this is quite an endorsement.

So much of life has to do with boundaries: setting them, respecting them, communicating them. Improvement in these areas almost guarantees better quality of personal and professional life. I’m glad to know those of us still working on our needs for security, approval and perfectionism– that would be all of us–have another resource to help.